RLT Event Recap: The Winner Is....

My Tweet-Up, Book signing Saturday night was a blast! I'm always happy to hang out with the people I meet through Social Media. Honestly, I have met some good people through both of my Facebook pages, Twitter and my Blog.

We ate, laughed, people purchased my book and bracelets, and we tweeted HIV/AIDS information in the swanky Donna's Cafe, in Chicago's South Loop.

 I had some great swag bags and great food. Donna hooked us up and the dessert was courtesy of Patrick's Butter Cookies, Kilwins provided yummy fudge and Ramon DeLeon,  Dominos, Lava Cakes. If you have never had either, you don't know what you are missing, BTW, Patrick's (PGC Lunchroom Cookies are sold in Walgreens Chicago.

Patrick... And Follow him on Twitter. He finally made it @Cookie_Tycoon

 Honestly, the biggest fun was people trying to win the Grand Prize, the use of a GMC/Chevy vehicle for one week.

They were so cute taking pictures of the Terrain and Tweeting them, especially Vau've Jay and Valencia.

Vau'ue Valencia, Me and Jay

I also love  the fact that I work with some great brands, like GMC. They are a brand with an honest reciprocal relationship with Bloggers and their readers.  Read my Blog on GMC/Chevy HERE..

Markeeda  My BFF Looking Fab with Wilbert my walking buddy!

Maureen, The Owner of O'Brien's Sporting RLT Collection Summer 2012!

Chanel Sporting RLT Collection! 

Any who, I'm proud to announce that Valencia won the grand Prize. She is so geeked about her one week use of a GMC/Chevy vehicle. I wouldn't be surprised if she asked for the Terrain because everyone that saw it that night, fell in love with it. I know for me, in that one week, I concluded if I were going to purchase a vehicle the Terrain would be in the number three going.

Cee Cee Holding her raffle Prize from one of my biggest supports of the event  Eden's Fantasy

Ramel holding his raffle prize.. Earrings designed by Samantha owner/designer of Sound Chick Accessories

More Cupcakes made sure everyone walked away with a gift card for a free cupcake! LOVE, LOVE, LOVE More...

You missed a great event, but there will be more!

Valencia looking fab in the Terrain

Raffle Prize and Swag Bag Sponsors.. You can Follow them on Twitter. 

Post Script: You can purchase an autographed copy of my book Here... You can order through Amazon Create Space HERE. Also, RLT Collection is having an End of Season Sale... Great Markdowns plus an extra 10% off, Coupon Code at checkout is Diva Click Here

RLT Event: Meet, Greet, Tweet and Book Signing!

Here I go again! It's been over a year since my last HIV/AIDS Tweet-up! I thought that it was long overdue!

To date I've had 4 Tweet-Up's/Meet-Up's and they have all had their own personality and  have all been a blast!

My Events are a time to come together, meet, tweet and have fun, while at the same time, publicly supporting the issues around HIV/AIDS. We will Tweet and Facebook HIV/AIDS education throughout the night.

The coming together makes a statement. Just your presence challenges the stigma and shame that leaves people with HIV living in secret and shame. At RLT Events your presence alone is a STAND!

So here are the details! This will be a Meet, Greet, Tweet and Book Signing on August 25, 2012 from 6:00-8:30 at Donna's Cafe 1255 S. State Street, in Chicago, Illinois. It is FREE! However, I do want you to RSVP! HERE

I love the fact that local businesses have continually shown support for my work around HIV/AIDS. Remember the Heart to Heart Tweet Up at Kilwins? Well this one will be more of the same. Donna's Cafe is also a Black/Female owned business just like Kilwins.

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that Black women are supporting me in this fight. I will be telling you more about Ms. Donna in the weeks ahead. I'm honored that Donna is hosting this Event! It also gives you a chance to meet a local business owner! Follow Donna on Twitter!

I'm sooooo excited! I have so much in the works. This night I will also launch my Global Anti-Stigma Campaign; I Stand With RLT-Against Stigma and Shame Around HIV/AIDS! More details on this exciting campaign coming soon! Stay Tuned.

In the mean time, mark your calendar for August 25th! Come hang out with me for the evening, get your autographed copy of my new book The Politics of Respectability and Tweet about HIV/AIDS!

Yes, there will be Raffles, Light Refreshments and ummmm I'm working on a Swag Bag too!  Keep Your Fingers Crossed RSVP HERE!

Monday Reflection: There is Hope In Time....

Telling someone to hold on when it seems as if their world is falling apart sometimes seems futile. I mean their heart and spirit are screaming: CAN'T YOU SEE, I'm hurting? But yet all you can really say to them is hold on. I say it often, I even repeat it to myself, "Hold on Rae, tomorrow is another day." I do it because the Bible says there is life and death  in the power of the tongue. I do it because in that instant it reminds me that I want a tomorrow. Asking to hold on for an hour or even a moment is asking for time... Time for it to be better... To get better... There is hope in time...

But we wake in the morning and nothing has changed, we say, "But I thought the Bible says that joy comes in the morning?" Well, I'm a living witness that joy does come in the morning. It may not be tomorrow morning. It may not even be the morning after because our time is not God's time. And I've learned through my own history with God, His time sometimes seems like whack time, like, ummm where you at God? You forget about me? Yep, when you are going through, it's like, gee God, why you so slow? You may not voice it, but you think it and your heart feels it. 

But if you look back over your past isn't it interesting that it seems like you came out of that other situation just in the nick of time? Right before you were at the point of losing your mind...

I'm writing this post for all of us today. I have some close friends who are going through very difficult times right now. Their world is falling apart as they know it. Change is inevitable and sometimes painful. I write this blog for me because my health has taken a major hit and the hits just keep on coming. 

I want us all to remember that there is hope in time. If you can just hold on in that moment, it becomes a second which becomes a minute, which becomes an hour and then another day.

Pain is an inevitable part of life. Change is also an inevitable part of life. And they both serve to make us stronger and better. I don't understand why there is pain in this world, but there is. Pain and evil were the two most debated issues in my theology classes in seminary. And no one really had an answer. The Bible says simply, "In this world there will be tribulation, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world." With this in mind, I'm learning to be content in whatever state I'm in... Can't do shit about it anyway, except go through the journey... And stressing over the journey will only make the journey harder.

This is what I know for sure... God can use anything, even your pain, to enrich your life and the lives of others. So for all of us today, Hold On! Why? Because time will give you a better tomorrow. Hold on because each day you wake you are still a part of God's earthly plan. And life in and of itself is the most wonderful gift that God can render in your earthly journey.

Just think... If I had given up. Stop taking my medication, stop holding on in those days that were full with pain... Those days when I could barely hold my body up... When I could see death staring me back in my face... If I had stopped holding on, there would have never been a tomorrow. I would not be writing this blog today... So while we may not be able to see our way out of it at this moment... Hold on and allow your hope to rest in time... God's time!

PostScript: My health is not good... I plan to write a blog that outlines everything that is happening to help you fully understand how AIDS work... No, I'm not dying... But I am struggling... Keep me in your prayers as the doctors try to put me back together again. I will be taking some time to get better. I will not be blogging everyday, but I have asked some of my blogger friends to fill in the gap.

What's the point of having people who love and support you if you don't allow them to support you. You cannot want support on the one end and refuse it on the other. Sometimes God sends people to help us on our journey... Don't miss your blessing stuck. Don't deny the help that God sends your way out of pride. Its counteractive to your deliverance... Even Jesus had disciples...  Ain't no glory in suffering alone, you don't win a prize for that shit, you just create a harder and darker path for your deliverance.

So I hope you will continue to read as others help me fill in the gap.

The radio show Tea With Rae: Wellness For The Mind Body and Spirit will be postponed until after I'm completely off IV medication. The book club RLT Reads will be postponed over the summer. I will announce the summer read within the next week and we will discuss it in late September...

Thanks for all your support #IcannotdoitAlone

Yes, my next Tweet Up is tomorrow, Tuesday, June 14th at 7pm.... In honor of National HIV Testing Day. YES... I plan to have my IV medication on Tuesday during the day and get to SideTrack and have a blast with you... 

Please join us... I toured SideTrack Bar for the first time last night and it is freaking Fab. The guest DJ, Laura Branch, I understand is off the chain... We will be dancing, laughing, socializing, giving away wonderful raffles, tweeting and testing for and about HIV/AIDS. You can RSVP... I know a lot of you have said you are coming but have not RSVP'd. You can still show up but it would be nice to have you check in... HERE

Smooches

RLT

United In HIV! A Social Event For a Socially Conscious Cause!

I'm very proud of the groundbreaking work that I have been doing in social media to educate and challenge stigma and shame around HIV/AIDS. In just a little over a year, I have made a mark. When I embarked on this mission, I had no idea that it would take a life of its own. It's been good for me and the people that I engage daily, through Twitter, Facebook and this Blog.

I am exceptionally proud of my groundbreaking HIV/AIDS Tweet-ups. Taking a social event and carving out of it a social cause. To date, I have held two tweet-ups and on this Tuesday I will host my third in recognition of National HIV Testing Day. By the way, I'm taking my Tweet-Up's across the country to the cities where I'm speaking, beginning in September.

The thing that is really fun is that I have not locked myself into one type of Tweet-Up. The first one was held at Hotel Allegro Encore Liquid Lounge, with wonderful swag bags and raffles galore. A grand affair for sure. I was told it was one of the best swag bags ever. The second Tweet-Up was hosted by Kilwin's Chocolate, here in Old Town Chicago. I partnered with  my friend, Social Media Guru and Mommie Blogger, Dwana aka Houseonahill. We socialized, tweeted HIV statistics, ate chocolate and ice cream on that cold winter night, for National Black HIV Day.

Cyon in His Hostess Attire! 

Now on this Tuesday, June 14th, I'm going to SideTrack, a premier gay bar in the City of Chicago. Why? Well, because Gay Black men are our brothers, fathers, sons, grandfathers and cousins and yes, many of us  women have a BFF in our back pocket. The exciting thing is, I'm partnering with the Chicago Black Gay Men's Caucus. And the Dynamite, Fabulous Cyon Flare will be hosting on this night. And I've been told that he is the best Host on that side of town.

Side Track Bar is rolling out the red carpet for us and I'm way excited. Now it's gonna be a rough day for me. Yes, many of you know that Tuesday's are my IV medication day. But I will have my 6 hour IV drip, come home, rest my body and spirit. Have a cup of tea, put on my Ruby Woo lipstick and 4 inch heels and get there to have a blast.

We will be testing for HIV throughout the night. There will be lots of information, condoms and just a lot of fun people united around HIV. We will be tweeting HIV statistics throughout the night. There are raffle prizes from spa treatments to tea, RLT Collection, and the list goes on and on. We even have a tea give away for the first 100 people. Cyon and Craig Johnson of the Chicago Black Gay Men's Caucus have worked their tails off. I'm grateful that they took up all the slack when I became ill. And of course my wonderful assistant Latoya always does her part. If not for them this would not be happening.

What's so awesome is this, Boys Town will have no idea what hit them. The fact that a Black Woman is not afraid to partner with Black Gay men and unite around a cause is groundbreaking. We are showing Chicago that as a people, we are united around the issue of HIV/AIDS. And we have even invited the Mayor. We are keeping our fingers crossed that he will choose our National Testing Event, as he is planning to drop in on some in the city during this month.

This is going to be a lot of FUN! Laura Branch, former director HIV/AIDS Division of the Chicago Department of Public Health, will be our special guest DJ and I have heard that she is off the chain.

Cyon! 

Ok, so come out and have a little fun with us. I might even dance in spite of how I'm going to feel from my IV treatment. Now if I can dare to take such an important stand on the need to work together with our brothers and pull my Diva together and get there after 6 hours of IV medication, then you can at least come hang out with us. With me and Cyon, ha, we will be the hostesses with the mostesses and all for a great cause.

You can RSVP Here. We just want to get a head count. The event is Free! But if you give a $10 donation you will receive a free drink. Yes, there will be spirits, but Starbucks will be there serving, yep, you guessed it, tea. And the money will be spilt straight down the middle between me, to support my work around HIV/AIDS, and the Chicago Black Gay Men's Caucus.

See Ya Tuesday! We are United In HIV!  #UnitednHIV Like I say on Twitter everyday #ICannotdoitAlone and neither can Gay Black Men. We must come together if we are going to see a change happen for the best in our community around HIV/AIDS.

United In HIV!

Black Gay men are our brothers, uncles, fathers, grandfathers, cousins and sons. And for some they are our BFF's. No matter the label, for sure they are a vital part of our village. And I, for one, am fed the hell up with all the blaming that goes on in our community around the infection rate of black women from men on the Down Low.

Yep, I'm going there. The Centers for Disease Control has said over and over again the statistics just don't add up. Down Low brothers have not single handed caused the HIV infection rate among black women. They don't people! About half of the women infected with HIV in the United States are from the use of a dirty needle during IV drug use. And furthermore, we still have a large portion of men infected from IV drug use and those men do have sex with women.

Now, don't misunderstand me, YES there are men who have sex with men, and then turn around and have sex with women. They are out there, I have heard countless stories over the years. I have even dated one. Yep, I dated a brotha that was on the Down Low. It was a long time ago, about a year after discovering that I was HIV infected. He knew that I was infected with HIV and was purely comfortable with my status. On his death bed at age 29, I discovered that he had been living a double life. He did not infected me, remember, I was already infected when I met him. But I was angry as hell that all this time he knew my status, but never told me his. Thank God for common sense and condoms or he would have re-infected me.

He was one fine ass, like I mean fine ass brotha and he had lived this double life because people expected him to date women, cause a brotha that fine needed a sista. I will admit it took years for me to get over it, but when I had that Aha moment, I got it! He had been living this double life, with self-hatred, until the day he died. I got it! If the Black community had created space for him to be who he believed he truly was, he would have never lived this double life.

I accepted my culpability as a member of the Black community and I stopped playing into this covert homophobia that has infested the Black community. Even when we have a family member that is openly gay, we don't create space in our families for them to live and breath freely. Do we ask them if they have a partner? If they are lonely? If they are happy? Do we support them in their personal life the way they support us? This don't ask, don't tell policy in our community is unhealthy and it is killing our brothas.

Like how do you show love and concern for one family member's dating life and not the other and do it in their face. Like gee, you have no concern for their happiness? Your silence speaks a lot louder than your words. And don't tell me that your disapproval of their lifestyle is that thing that blocks you from loving them unconditionally. Who the hell died and made you God? This double standard I see is crazy. The shit we let straight men get away with in our community. For Real! I learned the other day that a prominent, prominent minister got his assistant pregnant and divorced his wife and never took any time away from the pulpit to get his act together and that was ok... Huh? Yep, double standard!

When you don't feel loved, you go searching for it. This alienation of Black Gay men in our community helps to fuel their low-self esteem and leads to unhealthy behavior and is a factor in their increased rate of HIV infection. So I'm going on record. I love Black Gay men and ain't a damn thing you can do about it.

Yes, there are brothers that live a double life and yes, the Down Low is a factor in the rate of  HIV infection for black women, but it's NOT the only one. In addition to drug use, there are brothas out there that sling their penis from woman to woman. Yep, they have sex with one woman and then turn around and have sex with another woman. Like the minister I was just talking about.

Yep! That's why I tell women to take control and responsibility of their own freaking body! You have no idea if the penis is with Bob or Barbara when it ain't with you, so why are you out there having sex without a latex condom? *confused look* #forReal. And then blaming everyone but yourself. *blank stare*

So anyway, I'm taking a stand! I cannot be concerned about the HIV infection rate within the African-American community and not be concerned about our brothers. The Centers For Disease Control estimates that one in two Black Gay men have HIV. We cannot throw our brothers away because we don't approve of their lifestyles. Shoot, if I took a looking glass into your life, I probably will not approve of everything that I see. For real! So don't go Holy on me. Please... Let me say it like this, DO NOT come at me with the Bible because I will come back at you with the same Bible and then tell you to stay the hell off my blog!

With that said, I'm so excited about my next RLT Event, #UnitedinHIV Tweet-up. Lip service is over for me when it comes to supporting our brothers, uncles, cousins, sons, fathers and BFFs who happen to be gay. I am very proud to be partnering with the Chicago Black Gay Men's Caucus and the one and only Cyon Flare.  Together we are taking control through unity and advocacy! United in HIV Tweet-Up is in honor of National HIV Testing Day.

National HIV testing day is this month and it's true, the earlier you know your status the longer you live. And if you know your status the chances are slim that you will infect someone else. We will be offering HIV testing that evening because we want to stop this cycle in the Black community. We don't get tested so we die sooner than our white counterparts and when we don't know we are infected we infect others. About 38% of newly diagnosed cases are people infected by people that didn't know they were infected.

So join me and my friends as we Tweet about HIV and have a blast doing it. It's gonna be fun. The one and only Lora Branch (Director of HIV/AIDS division of the Chicago Dept. of Public Health) will be the guest DJ... This should be fun! And I will be raffling off  RLT Bracelets and yes, some tea items from my tea partners.

The Tweet-up is June 14th at the best gay bar in the city of Chicago, Side Track, 3349 North Halsted Street, from 7-9 P.M. And it's FREE... But a $10 donation will get you a free drink and all the money will go to RLT (me) and the CBGMC, half-straight down the middle...

Please RSVP... Here!!! I'm excited to be partnering with my brothas on this vital issue that has deeply affected our entire community. Be there or be square. But I'm #UnitedinHIV.

Blessings Come in Many Ways...

Everyone knows that I simply love chocolate. So I was elated when I saw the Kilwin's sign go up in Old Town, not too far from my house. I waited patiently for them to open but it seemed like forever. They started construction that summer but didn't open until October 3rd.

But OMG the first time I bit into the caramel chocolate dipped marshmallow on a stick I knew my tummy had been blessed. But who would have thought this shop would render more blessings to me then I could have ever imagined.

Jacqueline Stepping Up Her Twitter Game!

After my second visit I discovered that the owners were African-American. I felt a sense of pride to learn that an African-American couple had opened a shop on the Gold Coast. They were so cool, and Jacqueline knew my story. She knew who I was and was excited to meet me. We bonded over small talk and samples of fudge.

 As the fall left and the winter came I would drop in for my chocolate fix. The store was holding it's own but there didn't seem to be a mad rush for ice cream and homemade chocolates. I'm sure that some of the neighbor folk who were not familiar with the Kilwin's chain clung to the historic Fudge Pot down the street. They opened so late in the season that it seemed to be affecting their business. But the tasty delights, the wonderful owners, and a desire to support them kept me coming back. And each time I dropped in I talked to Jacqueline about Twitter. You all know the Twitter addict I am thinks it's the 21st century solution to just about everything.

She was listening to me. She opened an account and I think I saw maybe one tweet a week. LOL! So last week I had had enough. I marched right in and told her husband we should do a tweet-up. Let people know that you are here and alive. My girlfriend, fellow blogger and Tweeter Dwana, and I had been talking about doing something together since forever and it seemed like the perfect fit.

Me and Dwana at #RLTEvent

The next day I went over there and Jacqueline and I sat down to make it happen. She was delighted to host a Tweet-up for National African-American HIV/AIDS Awareness Day. It was settled in 10 minutes! Carmel corn, fudge, brittle, hot chocolate and ice cream. Heart to Heart For HIV (#Heart2Heart4HIV). People could come and tweet to bring awareness to HIV/AIDS on this important day and have some wonderful treats at the same time. That's the perfect Tweet-up, something to munch on, tweeting, and conversing all at the same time and no one thinks you're being rude. But my sense of pride about the partnership is strong. People are always talking about what Black people ain't doing about HIV and never about what they are doing. Dwana nor Jacqueline are obligated but they feel it's necessary and important!

Jacqueline  Setting up her Twitter

On that day Jacqueline and I sat and talked for the next couple of hours. I had some delicious hot chocolate and gave her pointers to step up her Twitter game. We downloaded Twitter onto her iPhone and got busy.

Then, as it goes for women who connect, we shared our life stories. LOL! I told her about my lack of speaking engagements and holding on by a thread finical; And she shared with me the struggles of being a businesswomen. We also talked about Twitter and how I was using it for HIV/AIDS education and prevention. I also talked about the need to have the iPhone 4 so I could step up my Twitter game.  But with no speaking engagements in site, I didn't see it in my future anytime soon.

But in these last few years I've learned to live with what I got, not with what I want. But I've also learned you never know how God will bless you. I tell people all the time not to box God in. God's dreams for your life is much larger than your dreams could ever be. Be patient. #ForReal. God's time is not our time. I also say, it's just nice to be nice, you never know how, when, or why a person, even a stranger, will enrich your life.

The next day, Jacqueline tweeted me that she had a surprise for me. Yep, you guessed it! Her husband took me straight to the Apple Store to get me my new iPhone 4. I think I'm still in shock. It's been so hard for me in these last years. And many people who I thought would have helped me, punched out. But it's clear to me that God always fills the void.

Who would  have thought that this woman, basically a stranger to me would be such a blessing to me in so many ways. She blesses my tummy with those delightful creations in her shop, she's sponsoring our Heart To Heart For HIV Tweet-up for National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day, and she sowed a personal seed into my ministry with my new iPhone 4. Now I can tweet and never leave my bed on those days that I'm not feeling well. Yep... It's true, Blessings Come in Many Ways... Don't box God in, you may miss your blessing looking in the wrong direction.

Note: Next week a review of  Kilwins wonderful delights... In the meantime we hope that you will join us on Feb. 7th... Don't forget to RSVP.