Monday Reflection: Do Better!!!

The old saying, “When you know better, you should do better," has been floating around forever. I first heard it from Oprah who got it from Maya Angelou. People quote it often but I wonder how many of us actually put our words into action. For those who have been reading my blog you know that I have had to work at doing better, even in the face of knowing better.

It's an ongoing struggle, even for overachievers like me. It's interesting, you know in your heart when you are not living up to your own standards, but it's a hard thing to face. Then something happens that forces you to face that hard reality and it hits you like a ton of bricks. That happened to me on World AIDS Day. I hung out with Relana Johnson at her GoodGyrrl dance studio to have a candid discussion with women about dating, sex, and living healthy, and toward the end, someone asked me point blank, "So, since the name of the event here today is *do better* what advice do you have for the women to actually do better?

I started explaining to the women that at some point you have to say enough is enough and be willing to face loneliness to become the woman you can be proud of. And truly, once you make the right changes in your life, you will open yourself up for the goodness to come in. Nothing good can get through the door when the bad is blocking the way. It's like this, you're in the bathroom shitting, the door and window are closed and the poop sucks up all the oxygen. And often when we finish, we get air freshener and spray, and then it smells like air freshener and poop, trying to hide the nasty. Right? Right! It's not until you open the door and windows and let the bad stuff out, will the good stuff come in.

I submit, you've gotta be willing to take chances to get to the better. Not just with dating, but in all areas of your life. What I know for sure I learned from my mentor Rev. Jesse L. Jackson. He taught me that if you don't run you are guaranteed to lose; if you do run, you might lose. You can't let the fear of failure paralyze you from being the person God intended for you to be or interfere with your life's purpose(s). You can't see His vision, but it's a living being running though your veins and when you alter from what you know to be right, good and purposeful it interferes with God's direction for your life slowing down progress.

So today I have a renewed pledge to *do better* in all areas of my life. To get out of God's way with my selfish mortal desires and be willing to accept that the thing I want most is the thing that stunts my growth. Be willing to take chances with my brand and ministry when the vision is clear and purposeful, but the growth is slow. I must remember, God's time is not our time and if He has planted that seed in you, it will definitely grow. You just have to keep watering that thang, talk to it and give it sunlight, and watch it grow. Remember, a bamboo plant grows tall but it's not until that seventh year that it blooms right before your eyes. So I challenge you all today to make a list, check it twice, and get to work to *do better*.